John Boehner's Drunken Soliloquy

Na gwdha shog dammd Amuricans I hate this shit. I hate the Tea Party. I hate Obama. I just love my jack goddamit. I don't give a damn if Amrurica goes to hell in a handbasket. I got a golf date and if that goes bad I'll know my world is through. Until then I will depend on others to extract me from this shithole. I'm plane my part damn. Alright you want it straight. This is a holdup. Shit is that the President I see. NOOOO. You can't order me around like that. Oh you can? Whoops. NOOO. Don't you touch that bottle! Get out of here. Cancelled? Me? Wake me up. Tell me it's over. I don't know what the hell I'm doing. OK Eichman ... I got it .... Ah, let me sleep ...

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